County Meeting Ends Early After Microphone Develops Better Ideas
Officials voted 6–1 to let the microphone finish its remarks.
City Replaces Fireworks With One Extremely Confident Man Shouting “Boom”
The change reduced costs but generated mixed reviews from dogs.
Gym Reports January Crowd Has Reserved Every Treadmill for February
Management expects availability to return suddenly around January 12.
Mall Santa Requests Witness Protection After Recognizing Too Many Parents
The holiday professional says he knows who returned gifts before breakfast.
Federal Mediator Called After Thanksgiving Gravy Dispute Enters Third Hour
Negotiators established a neutral mashed-potato zone between both sides.
Neighborhood Declares Independence From HOA for Eleven Minutes
The rebellion ended when residents learned the pool key would stop working.
Woman Arrested After Presenting Corn Dog as Identification
Police say the suspect remained confident until an officer asked for the expiration date.
Town Installs New Year’s Resolution Drop Box, Immediately Files for Overtime
Officials said the box became overwhelmed after receiving 4,000 promises to start Monday.